November 9, 2010

Music and musings from within

I was on my way home today and listening to music as I tend to do when I'm driving. The thought crossed my mind that my tastes in music have gradually changed over the years. I used to listen to a good portion of country and 80's metal (Van Halen, Ozzy and the like). Now I listen to more mellow music. Don't get me wrong, I still love things like Godsmack and Stone Sour but I go for a calmer more inward seeking music.

Give me guitars, drums and pianos. I can feel these instruments. When I realized that was why I preferred the softer music, I started asking myself WHY I felt this way and it occurred to me that I think of the different pitches in the way the react with my body. Low drum beats, bass guitar and pianos I feel deep within the core of my body whereas electric guitars and the higher pitched noises go straight to my head. It's like hearing a dog whistle or nails scraping across a chalkboard for me.

Lower tones I feel each beat of the drum or each key of the piano touching, the bass guitar or even a regular guitar as long it's not higher pitched. These all go through me and cause me to seek inwards that which I feel with every fiber of my being. The high pitches disrupt the harmony of my mind and are almost as if the strands of the web that make up my mind become entangled and it hurts to think. It's all sharp angles and lines with higher pitches, but with lower its curves and grooves that fit oh so well.

Someone once said they were surprised that I don't describe myself using rock music more than I do. I hadn't thought about it until then but it's true. I use songs like Lady in Red or Just Breathe or Ebudae when thinking on songs that reflect who I am. I believe this is because my emotions are very strongly tied to music. When I listen to a song, my emotions tend to turn towards the direction of the song. If it is an angry song, I feel angry. If it is calm and flowing, I feel the same. If it is happy and bouncy (Popcorn, the Crazy Frog version is a good example of this), so am I. So in picking music, I try to pick music that matches my mood.

Something like Godsmack (like Keep Away) is for when I'm pissed off at the world and/or wishing to rail against the cage of my own making. I do have those emotions inside and they do need to be let out every once in a while, but it's usually when I'm by myself and I can beat on an inanimate object and no one will ever know that I was that upset. But when I think of myself in general, angry isn't how I see me. I guess this is a good thing when you think about my past.

I don't know what all of this says about me but I just felt like it had to be said so here it is.

1 comment:

  1. I have very vivid memories of laying my head against the soundboard of the piano as my mom played. Of course, it was either church music or classical, but the same sense as you flowed through me too. Another thing, as you grow order, you tend to become more conservative too :p

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